


Most Nights, I Don't Know

by JessicaDoom



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Anal Sex, Depression, Halloween Costumes, Light BDSM, M/M, Online Dating
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-12-21
Updated: 2013-12-21
Packaged: 2018-01-05 09:08:50
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 10,546
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1092128
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JessicaDoom/pseuds/JessicaDoom
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Five years after divorcing Ginny, Harry's setting out on a final attempt at love. But the results were not exactly what he was looking for. But why should some past hate and long-dead loyalties bar him from a chance at something real.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally to be a Halloween fic, but I've extended it into a chaptered fic, rather than a one shot. So I hope you enjoy!

Harry was desperate. He had nowhere else to turn. Everywhere else and anything else that he tried ended up in heartache. Nothing was _working_. And he needed a new approach. His soul yearned for it.

He wouldn't have taken such a downward leap if he didn't need it so much.

To a Muggle, internet dating could either be seen as a desperate or ingenious move. Harry struggled with that line for quite awhile. This wasn't him. It wasn't the fact that it was Muggle. No, he didn't mind that at all. The Muggle world often felt very comforting to him. The problem lay more with the fact the he just felt strange even thinking about going through with it. The idea of some random person getting to know him with possibly miles upon miles of distance between them was…eerie. To say the least.

Yet he hadn't hesitated one bit once he'd begun to set up the profile. The only reason it took him nearly two hours to finish was that he had to over think everything that he wrote. Even now, as he stared vacantly into his closet, he could remember how much he had struggled over the simplest things.

_"Occupation…. Can't very well say Auror. No one would know what that means…. Fuck…. Um…how about…? Police officer?" His eyes had flicked up to his username – SweepMeOffMyFeet. Would anyone believe someone so macho as a police officer would have come up with something so fruity? Immediately, he had hit the backspace button until the blank was emptied. In its place he typed out 'parliament guard'. It wasn't all that farfetched._

_The next hardest question was what he was looking for in a partner. It really stumped him. When it came down to it, he wasn't altogether sure what he wanted. All he knew was what he didn't want. So, to answer the question, he had put the opposite of those negative qualities. "I don't want a one-night stand. What I'm looking for is a committed relationship. I want to be made to feel special and necessary. But, most of all, I want to feel normal. Special…but ordinary." Short, but somehow it was perfect. The last bit was absolutely necessary, he knew. Since defeating Voldemort, too many people had given him special attention. Even Ginny. She sacrificed practically anything she wanted in order to please Harry._

_It was the biggest reason they were no longer married._

_Quite a few other questions caused him to draw a blank, as well, but not so severely. "Hobbies? The Muggle way of saying Quidditch is…. Uh, guess I could say football…. Football and playing chess with my children. Okay, honestly? What adult has a favorite color? Whatever…green…. Favorite food should be easy enough…. Does chocolate count? Sure, why not?"_

_In the end, Harry had been quite satisfied with the outcome of his profile. The only thing he hadn't managed to complete was the profile picture. The thought of just anyone knowing what he looked like was eerie. And after he'd examined the other profiles, it seemed quite a few of the other men his age did as well. So he left it alone._

"Dad?"

Pulling from his mental recap, Harry turned with a plastered, shaky smile to look at his son. "Yes, Albus?"

The petite, dark-haired boy smiled softly and flopped down upon his father's bed. "You're nervous." The phrasing in no way indicated a question. He was a very keen observer. He could note the small details that led to his resolute conclusion.

Harry cleared his throat to erase any shake his voice may have had. "That's ridiculous. What have I got to be nervous about?" But the hesitancy to his question gave away the he was, indeed, lying.

"It's your first real date since Uncle Charlie. You have everything to be nervous about." The laugh that bubbled past Albus' lips was somehow reassuring to his father. He sensed this in the way Harry's lips twitched into a more eager grin. "It'll be fine, I bet. This guy seems…exciting. From what you've divulged about him…." He raised a brow in the man's direction.

Harry really hadn't said much about his date for the night. All he had shared with a few choice people was that their personalities had seemed to flawlessly click. Honestly, somehow that seemed to put people at ease about the whole ordeal.

Maybe if they knew the other small details, they wouldn't be so keen to let him go out with the man. Details such as his date's distaste for family values or that he openly admitted to a deep love of bondage. He hadn't even told anyone the other's screen name. It made him blush just to think about the five-letter word that said it all – _Cocky_.

This was why he was nervous. He wasn't entirely sure he was ready for such a _man_.

"Did you figure out a costume yet?"

Harry shook his head, sighing as he once more turned back to glaring into his closet. For some reason, he had agreed to let their first, live date be at a Halloween party at one of the local bars. He had also consented to wearing a costume. The problem was, never had he dressed in a costume before. He owned not even a scrap of something that would do. Nothing he had would make the right impression. Not the right impression, anyway…. "The best I can come up with is to wear my robes and carry my wand. But…that seems…."

"Childish." Harry nodded in agreement, looking over his shoulder at Albus. "Well, it's a good thing you have such a wonderful son, right?" The rustling of a plastic bag drew their brilliant jade eyes to meet. "I bought you a costume. Well…I bought it for myself, but you'll get better use of it, I'm sure." Al smiled wickedly as he pulled a dark costume from the grocery sack.

For a long moment, all Harry could do was stare in a mixture of confusion and worry. He then cleared his throat again and asked softly, "What on earth is it?"

"The Dark Knight. You know, Batman?" When Albus' explanation didn't get the look of dawning he'd hoped, he sighed and tossed the garments at his father. "You know, masked superhero played by the super delicious Christian Bale? Bit of an old film, but still awesome."

A stretch of silence followed where they both stared at the extremely padded costume. Then Harry quietly mumbled, "Bat…man…?"

At this point, Al seemed rather frustrated. He bounced up off the bed, crossing to his petulant father. "Yes! Basic rundown is that he's an orphaned rich kid who turns his fear of bats into super-strength. Uses a bunch of gadgets and shit – sorry, crap," he amended at the sharp look of disapproval. "No superpowers, to speak of. But he'd still really great. And sexy. So put the costume on and go meet your man."

Harry couldn't help the chuckle that fell from his lips. He, like always, wondered how he'd produced someone so quirky for a son. "It's times like these that really make me remember you're only eighteen." He tousled Albus' hair softly before taking the costume. "But…I'm not wearing this, Albus. Sorry."

"Yes, you are. You've already told Mr. 'Cocky' you'll be dressed as the sultry Dark Knight." The look upon the young man's face was purely cunning as he backed out of the bedroom. Purely Slytherin.

"Fuck…." His door shut and any confidence he may have had left with his son. He really had no choice now. The internet coupling had been relying on an identifying costume to help them find one another. Apparently, Harry was now volunteered to be the one in the dark. And not having control in a situation like this made him extremely uneasy. What if he didn't like this guy when he saw him? It didn't really matter, now. He had no choice but to go through with the date.

It was with a shaky hand that Harry put on the surprisingly well-made costume. But he did put it on. And, as he looked at his reflection in his full-length mirror, he couldn't help but to feel like he looked desirable. Sure, the padding was mostly in his chest and abs, yet he had muscles to match underneath. So was it really all that much of a lie? Slowly, he pulled the black mask adorned with bat ears over his face. From that moment, he could no longer recognize himself. Those were his intense green eyes staring back at him, but apart from that, he was a stranger. This fact brought a delighted grin to his lips.

"I did good, didn't I?"

Harry nodded in response to Albus' smug question. He didn't turn to look at the boy, unable to take his eyes off of himself.

"Awesome…. Damn, Dad, you look hot." Momentarily, Harry met the other set of emerald orbs in the mirror, one brow raised beneath his mask. "No, there's only one detail to attend to." Albus grabbed his father's arms, turning away from the mesmerizing reflection.

With a sigh, Harry looked down at his watch. "Make it fast," he said. "I need to be there soon."

"Yes, yes. I know. All you need to complete this is to fix your voice." Albus held up his finger to silence Harry as he began to protest. "No, just listen. In the Dark Knight films that I was talking about, Christian Bale had this way of disguising his voice that's to _die_ for. All he does is deepen it like this." After clearing his throat, he spoke out, "I am the Batman," in as best of a husky, throaty growl as he could.

Harry couldn't help but to crack up. He tried to hide his laughter behind his hand, but Al still gave him a semi-hurt look. "Sorry. Just…don't do that again."

Teeth gritted, Albus merely crossed his arms and stared his father down. Despite humiliating himself, he wasn't ready to give up trying.

For a few moments, Harry only stared back. But time was ticking. He sighed and gave in. "Fine." After thinking it over, he attempted to speak those words in the same tone. He must have done well, because Al replaced his scowl for a bright grin instantly. As opposed to when the boy had tried, he was able to attain a sound that actually seemed attractive. It was rough and deep, clearly oozing an instant sex appeal.

"Perfect. Just…so perfect." Albus stepped away and motioned for the door. "Now go get 'im."

It wasn't much of a walk down to the bar. He only lived a few blocks away; one of the reasons he had chosen this location. He needed to feel comfortable. And since he frequented this bar on the regular, it just felt perfect.

The party was in full-swing when he arrived. Everywhere he looked, people donned creative costumes. He even swore that he saw a walking toilet at one point. But apart from the occasional glance, he wasn't very keen to keep his attention on one person. His nerves ran rampant as he made his way to the bar, taking one of the few empty stools. He was quick to order a vodka tonic, hoping to steady himself at least a little bit.

The prospect of basically anyone in this room being his mystery date scared him more than any duel with Voldemort ever had. His lack of power here was daunting. And the fact that he'd been here a half hour and still nothing had happened wasn't helping in the least.

Harry was dangerously close to calling it quits just as he heard a soft purr near his ear. "Please tell me you're the right Batman…. I have already tried three other men and honestly I am growing bored…."

The voice was icy and harsh, yet it oozed a sexual quality. He had no doubt in his mind that this was the right guy. The cockiness was practically a musky scent on him. Yet, the voice was all too familiar. And that familiarity was enough to make him freeze up.

He couldn't admit to himself that it could be true….

"Fuck it, I give up," the man muttered harshly, pulling away and flopping down in the seat beside Harry. From the corner of his eye, he was able to scope out the man he had been chatting up the last month. It was all he could do to hold back the only half-horrified gasp threatening to escape his chest.

The first thing that he saw was the shockingly white-blonde crop of hair pulled back into a loose and messy ponytail. A pigment that could only belong to one family. Same as the sharp, angular lines of his face as it curled into an angry and slightly disappointed expression.


	2. Chapter 2

For only half a second, Harry entertained the idea of merely leaving. He was sure this was a bad idea. But they had gotten along so well online…. And the majority of his mind thought that was a good sign. Besides, his identity was still a secret he was sure.

Harry Potter cleared his throat and turned towards his school-time nemesis. "I _am_ the Batman," he said huskily, shifting closer to Draco Malfoy. Their legs touched, sending shivers up Harry's spine, causing a spooky grin to cross his lips.

Eyes the color of frozen oceans locked onto his grassy green ones, slightly thrilled. "Oh, are you?" Draco snorted before signaling the bartender. He ordered a surprisingly fruity drink and another vodka tonic for Harry. A more gentlemanly ct than Harry thought the other had in him. This only solidified his resolve to stay even more.

Playing it safe, Harry whispered his gratitude in the same tone. He was sure Draco could recognize him if he spoke in his own voice.

"You certainly are quiet, aren't you?" The blonde spoke gently, turning on his stool to give Harry a better look-over. He must have been satisfied with what he saw because he would not avert his eyes.

In this new position, Harry now had a better look at his date's costume. His brow furrowed beneath the mask as he tried to place just what Draco was trying to be. He wore a Victorian-style jacket, tailored to accentuate his figure perfectly. Underneath was a slightly feminine, ruffled white shirt and at the end of the flouncy sleeves were his delicate, pale hands. All of this, covered in blood, which he hoped badly to be fake. The overall costume gave Draco a dignified, yet horribly unapproachable, look.

For the first time in his life, Harry couldn't help but to think Draco Malfoy was gorgeous. He blushed a deep maroon and prayed a silent 'thank you' to his son for suggesting a mask.

"What are you supposed to be? A vampire?" Harry asked in the same masked tone.

Draco looked indignant at the mere suggestion, giving his opposite a pitying look. "Dorian Gray," he said quietly, pushing stray strands of blonde from his eyes. "Much more admirable than what vampires have become these days."

All Harry could do was stare back at Draco, absolutely lost. He obviously did not know Muggle culture well enough to understand him. He had heard the name Dorian Gray before but who exactly he was didn't ring any bells. Likewise, the comment about vampires didn't catch. Clearly, Albus would need to do a bit more coaching when he returned home. "Right…," he said slowly, attempting not to look too lost.

Those steely grey eyes never left him as Harry took a long drink. Draco was calculating, he could tell. Judging if this was worth his time. Meaning, he only had a matter of a few seconds to hook him for good. Though, why he was so desperate to stay in Malfoy's presence and interests was absolutely beyond him.

"Look," he said quietly, leaning in much closer, "why don't we…get out of here. I think I'd rather it just be you and me tonight. Wouldn't you?"

A strange spark ignited behind the seal on Draco's emotions at the suggestion. His lips quirked u into some semblance of a smile "Do you?" He chuckled and lightly grazed his delicate fingers over the small of Harry's back. "I think that I would like that, as well…."

Harry absently tossed down enough money to cover his tab, unable to focus on anything but the warmth of Draco's hand. He blindly followed it into a standing position, dizzy the moment he was on his feet.

Maybe it was the fact that this was Draco Malfoy, or maybe Harry was just that rusty at this sort of thing, but he had a hard time figuring out what to say or do next. In the time that it took him to form even a coy smile, they were already out on the street, walking away from the bar.

Luckily, Malfoy was outgoing enough for the both of them. "You do know that, typically, an exchanging of names occurs before a date begins, right?" He leveled that full-of-himself gaze he so often had on Harry, teasing written in his grey eyes.

"I would…prefer to keep my name to myself for now…."

Draco was unfazed. He continued walking, slipping his hand subtly around Harry's waist, resting on his left lip. "You must be someone of importance to keep yourself shrouded in so much secrecy." There was a hint of challenge to his tone, daring his date to take a dangerous step by exposing himself.

If it were anyone else, Harry would give away his identity in a heartbeat. But it wasn't someone else. This was Draco fucking Malfoy. Above anything else, Harry feared his rejection right now. So to keep safe, he only kept walking, mouth sealed shut and eyes trained on his feet.

Harry didn't even have to look up to know that Draco was smirking at him. Slowly, the blonde man pondered aloud to him, "You won't give me your name, you showed up in a mask covering every distinguishing part of your face, and you won't speak without disguising your voice…. Perhaps you are some sort of politician? Except that your profile said that you were some sort of parliament guard." Harry could feel his eyes studying every inch of him and suddenly felt naked. "You do know that wearing padded muscles gives off the impression that you are much too pathetic to have some of your own, don't you?"

Lips curling up in the corners, Harry shook his head back and forth slowly. "I assure you…if the padding had not come with the costume, I would have gladly forgotten it. I have absolutely no need for it…." He batted his eye into a sexual wink.

"You may just have to convince me of that, mystery man. I am not quite sure that I believe you. The word of a secretive being is hard to trust.

Again, Harry was extremely thankful that his face was covered. Even in the dark, he was sure Draco would have been able to see his dark blush. "Perhaps…. Later."

The words had barely left Harry's mouth before he was pushed rather forcefully into a side alley. He stumbled, reaching out to steady himself against the side of a building's wall. Draco grabbed his arms roughly and pushed him hard into the brick. Their bodies were intimately close, so close that Harry could smell a delicious combination of alcohol and cinnamon on his date's breath. The slow swelling in the lower portion of his costume made him nervous enough to try and shift away. No matter what moves he made, however, Draco blocked him. "Why do I have to wait until later? Don't you think that you've teased me enough for one night?"

Harry couldn't hide the arousal this harsh whisper brought on. Gasping shallowly for breath, he looked up to fully meet Draco's steely gaze for the first time that night. In those eyes he saw a deep desperation that kept his own green orbs lingering. He didn't even think clearly enough to worry about his infamous genetics revealing him.

For a long minute, Draco stared into the deep sea of jade. He didn't move or make a sound but his eyebrows slowly knitted closer and closer together. The end result was him taking a step back and ripping Harry's mask up off his face in one fluid motion. "You have got to be joking…."

Well, he would have had to find out at some point.

Now that he was exposed, Harry's horrified expression showed vividly. He had no words, no explanation. The fact that this had happened was nothing less than astonishing. Two former rival wizards, who had hardly spoken since, meeting on a Muggle dating was unspeakable. But the fact that Harry had gone with the date even after finding out Draco's identity was even more stunning. He just had no way to put his absent reasoning into words.

"At least it all makes sense, now," Draco said slowly, stepping back again and looking away. He seemed to be going through a few stages of disbelief. His facial expressions ranged from anger to confusion to mirth in the matter of just a few seconds. "Astoria set you up for this, didn't she?" Small, loose strands of platinum hair fell into his eyes in an attempt to hide the flash of hurt within him. "I fucking knew it. Just so fu-"

Harry had heard enough. His heart ached for some reason for Draco. He'd never felt this way about him. Never thought he _could_ feel this way about a man he'd hated for so long. In a rash decision, acting on pure impulse, he grabbed onto Draco's arm and pushed him against the opposite brick wall. The impact sounded harsh, but he didn't even stop to think. He crushed his lips desperately to those tasting so supple and sweet.

A fear crossed his mind as he felt the other man stiffen under him – _What if he didn't kiss back?_ Again, rejection was a looming possibility. Yet, just as he was about to give up and pull away, the pressure increased in his kiss. Unknowingly, he let out a dark moan and plunged both of his hands into the base of Draco's loose ponytail. It fell apart with his grip, drawing a curtain of pale yellow around their melded faces.

Lust fueled their actions further, bodies pressing closer and tongues tangling together. In no time, their stifled erections were grinding into one another's legs. Clearly, they were both a bit hasty and depraved. And maybe it was because they, in a way, knew each other so well. Or it could have been that they both had deep needs that ached for satisfaction.

Whatever it was, it was working remarkably well. Well enough that after only a few, or what seemed like a few, minutes, Draco's fingers left their soft exploration on Harry's back and ventured down around towards his bulging crotch. Unfortunately, he was sorely disappointed when he reached his destination. He pulled from the kiss, leaving Harry stunned and leaning forward for more. "Your costume's one piece?" the blonde whispered breathlessly, pale brows raised in a signature hidden smirk.

Harry cleared his throat and answered in his own voice, "Yeah…I suppose. But, um…maybe we shouldn't do this…here…." Whatever this happened to be.

All Draco could do was nod before turning away. He seemed to be taking deep breaths, trying to calm himself to walk around in public again. Finding this to be a good idea, Harry did the same. But the silence between them became awkward quickly.

For Harry, there was no doubt in his mind that the kiss they had just shared was the most passionate he'd ever experienced. Who could have imagined that it would come from Draco Malfoy of all people? Life surely was full of surprises. His only hope was that this would turn out to be a pleasurable one. He knew of Malfoy's frigid attitude. He that could mean bad news for him.

"You live a couple blocks from here, correct?"

Forcing away these bad thoughts, Harry nodded and forced a shaky smile. "Yeah. It's actually only a block and a half from here…." Harry caught on to what the other was implying as he made a 'lead the way' movement, his heart picking up. "Right…. Right, sure." His feet were heavy as he attempted to take them to his townhouse. Many thoughts ran through his mind, meanwhile, such as how Albus could perceive this and whether he was ready to move this fast with this particular guy.

After a few minutes of quiet but for their combined footsteps, they reached the familiar canary-painted house. Harry fumbled for his keys, unlocking the door with slight difficulty. "My son is most likely home," he warned in a solemn whisper. But by then the door was open and Draco was letting himself in. This attempt at an excuse didn't seem to bother him at all.

Both of their steps were halted, however, as loud music accosted them after Harry closed the front door. A blush and a frown appeared on Harry's face as he took a step further into the house. "Al?" he called, but it couldn't nearly have been loud enough.

"…in to look for a king. Anybody could be that guy!"

The lyrics went on loud and wild, only increasing Harry's complete and utter embarrassment. This whole ordeal was overwhelming enough without this snag. It would have been better if they had been able to rush into bed as planned. Or if his identity hadn't been found out. It was all just one huge, fucked up mess.

And to make matters worse, the moment Harry walked into his son's room, the horror only climaxed. "Albus Severus Potter! What the hell are you doing?!"

Startled, Albus jumped around to face his father. The captured look on his face admitted his shame. "D-dad…." Hurriedly, he lunged for the CD-player to silence the ear-splitting song. Then he looked down and realized that he was still clothed strangely and rather scantily. That was the horrific part. The loud rendering of ABBA was forgivable, but the skimpy female maid's uniform he was wearing really wasn't. Nor was the fact that he wasn't wearing any underwear. Or the older man sitting unclothed, under the sheets that was unable to meet anyone's gaze. Quickly, Al reached for a stray blanket, draping it over himself with a clear of his throat. "You…you were supposed to be out on a date. I thought…." He stopped mid-sentence, distracted from his own misdeeds by something over Harry's shoulder. "Oh…." A considerably large frown crossed his lips.

Harry out of the corner of his eye noticed Draco's shadow on the doorframe. He could practically feel the smirk on those pale, pink pouts. A little less than gently, he pushed his date out of view. "Right…. I was. But I'm home now and…." Big parental decisions like this weren't his strong spot. Therefore, he was having difficulty articulating what to do next. "Just be quiet, alright? And safe…." Face a mask of fury, he reached out and snapped the door shut.

Draco was in a right fit of chuckles as Harry could plainly see when he turned around. All that he could manage was a cross look in reply. "What?" the Malfoy heir hissed, narrowing his eyes at the other. "I have a right to laugh. It's comical. You know, the worst I've caught my son doing is wanking to a picture of his aunt. And, honestly, who could blame him? But this…. This is just not natural, Potter. Even your children are freaks."

Before the blonde could raise a manicured brow to end his jibe, Harry had him forced up against the wall. "I haven't made a single remark about your family," he whispered dangerously. "So, _don't_ insult mine." Their faces were inches apart, their heated breaths mingling with each angry thought.

"Punish me, then."


	3. Chapter 3

So they were still doing this. Even after they'd both had time to clear their heads and think about what it was they were doing. He still wanted to go through with this. It was clearly visible in the way he growled that demand.

Reminding himself that "cocky" had a particular liking for bondage, Harry subtly pulled his wand from its hidden place in his sock. In a matter of seconds, a simple spell had cinched Draco's hands together behind his back. He was about to protest, but Harry saw to gagging him as well. Afterwards, it was easy to drag him into the master bedroom, locking the door behind them. "Be careful what you wish for, Malfoy."

Forcing Draco down on the bed was easy instinct. As was ripping apart his tacky, yet flattering, ruffled shirt. A lusty hate greeted him from those steely eyes, challenging him to go further. But this was probably as far as he could go with being rough. He didn't have it in him to take pleasure from another's pain or discomfort. Plus, with his shirt wide open like this, Harry had a very plain view of the nasty scars marring Draco's chest. He'd already done that much….

A sudden urge filled him up, driving him to pull the gag from the other's mouth. Once that tempting mouth was freed, he straddled the thin frame and captured it with a force unmatched. Again, Draco's mouth full of tasty cinnamon and sinful alcohol threw him into a blind need. He couldn't help but to grind hard against the trim leg beneath him. For the first time since he was a teenager, he was acting like a dog in heat. He couldn't help but to grin at the thought into the raw, passionate kiss.

But a meeting of lips was not even close to enough. He craved _more_. Shivering with anticipation of his own actions, Harry began a trail of kisses down Draco's jaw and to his neck. They were gentle at first, but the further down that he went, the more excited he grew. It became so strong, this desire, that he soon found himself nipping with only slight roughness at the alabaster collarbone at his dispense.

"Mm…Potter, you fucking tease…." Loosely, Draco struggled at his bonds. But it seemed only for show there was a glint in his slate eyes that clearly showed how much he was enjoying this.

Harry's real target in this journey was not the delicious bone structure of the colorless chest. His prize was the raised scar tissue marring the skin's supple perfection. He felt the other wince as he first took a lick at them. It was clear that he despised them. Something changed in Draco's demeanor straight away. This ceased to be a game for him.

"Shh…," Harry tried soothingly, pressing delicate kisses into the scars. By worshipping the wounds like this, he hoped to in a way make recompense for what he'd done. It was, after all, one of his biggest regrets. Draco could have very well died that day. "You're very brave," he said quietly, his deep probing eyes momentarily meeting silver.

Snorting, Draco rolled his eyes and muttered hastily, "Will you just shut up and fuck me, Potter? I don't need you to fucking save me, so get on with it." There was more urgency than annoyance in his voice.

Apparently, Draco wasn't much into foreplay. He played this fast and loose. So, Harry supposed that he could give into his pining for instant gratification. He took one more simple taste of the scars before standing up and beginning to undress. The costume fell easily in one fluid motion, revealing just what Harry had promised would be there. Even though he hadn't played Quidditch in years, he still kept in impeccable shape. The muscles of his abdomen were chiseled firmly into solid runes and divots. For a man of his age, he was beautifully fit. It came from hours of exercise every day before work. His body was the envy of every man in his office.

And it was more than possible to tell that Draco Malfoy was feeling exactly the same right now. He was eating Harry up with his gaze hungrily, making a deep and pathetic keening sound. "Told you," Harry whispered softly, crawling up over Draco again.

"You better not be compensating for anything," Draco chided, but his words came out breathy, as he was clearly impressed.

"Shut up." With a chuckle, Harry undid the ropes constricting the other's hands. It was only for a moment, allowing him enough time to pull off the shirt and jacket the rest of the way. Then his hands were retied at his front. From this position he was able to just get to his zipper. In no time, his slick jeans were popped wide open – the perfect invitation for Harry to go right on and take him.

Harry yanked the pants down, letting them rest around Draco's ankles. He took in the beautiful sight of the crème thighs at his disposal. He gripped them tightly, watching what small amount of blood there was at the skin's surface fall away at his pressure. His ministrations only served to make Draco more upset. His breath was rougher, coming in short rasps as his underwear began to visibly tent. Softly, under his breath, he kept muttering for release, yet he somehow managed to keep dignity in his voice. And Harry was finding that he couldn't hold off much longer, either.

This need aching through his bones rushed his movements to remove the rest of their coverings. For his private view only, Draco's cock stood straight at attention and is pert asshole sat shining for treatment. It looked so delicious that Harry couldn't help but to run a softly shaking finger over the rippled entrance. Draco hissed a breath in, the hold clenching instinctively to keep him out. That small movement to bar him access made his decision to not even bother prepping the other man. He wanted him _that_ bad. He couldn't wait any longer.

Draco could sense what was about to happen. "Don't you dare!" he hollered, attempting to use his elbows to sit up. But his hands were bound tight enough that he couldn't quite get enough leverage. So, unable to get away, he had to lay there and endure the pain of Harry not-so-gently digging his member deep into his backside. His cries of rage and agony were probably loud enough to wake the neighbors.

"Sorry…," Harry whispered gently, scrambling to reach his wand that lay just out of reach. The moment his fingers closed around the familiar wood, he casted a lubing charm to try and relieve some of the burn. This was a move he should have led with, but he was so out of practice that he'd forgotten. Luckily, his face was already red from arousal, so his deep blush went unnoticed. "Better?"

His jaw clenched and eyes shut firmly, Draco nodded slowly a few times. Feeling slightly more at ease, Harry buried himself further until he couldn't go any further. And then he rested. He concentrated on the waves of pleasure tingling every single one of his nerve endings. "Tell me when you're ready," he said on a breath. "I…really don't want to hurt you." And he sincerely didn't, but he could already see a few drops of blood staining his creamed-coffee-colored duvet.

"Just fucking do it," Draco said through gritted teeth, a small hint of loathing in his lust-clouded eyes.

"O-okay…." It took a long, deep breath for Harry to steady his doubtful thoughts. He was starting to think that maybe he'd made a mistake here. Honestly, what good could even come of this? But it was too late to go back now. So he had to clear his head and 'just do it'.

His thrusts were gentle and slow at first. Testing the waters. It was one of the most amazing things he'd ever felt. Draco felt perfectly, but not stranglingly, tight around him. So perfect that he couldn't help but to wonder if they were somehow each other's missing half. Like lost puzzle pieces coming together after a forever of searching. It felt _right_ , despite any thoughts he may have been having otherwise.

And, as he went faster and deeper, the intensity grew to a point of disbelief. Both men took in their breaths at the same time and pace. They were truly one, somehow. Even their moans and grunts of pleasure seemed to feed off the other's. it wasn't long before neither could tell which voice actually belonged to them. Harry's thrusts were perfectly rhythmic to Draco's heady rocking. There was no doubt in his mind that he was hitting the blonde man's sweet spot every time now as his cock had begun to weep. He was also making facial expressions he probably never would have been caught doing had he been more aware.

Even then, Harry couldn't help but to see how beautiful Draco really was. The years had definitely matured his aristocratic features.

"Potter!" Harry's eyes snapped onto the state-colored ones opened wide in a small measure of disbelief. "Fuck, Potter, untie my hands. _Now!_ "

"Say my name first…."

"Shut up and just fucking do it!"

" _Say_ it!"

"Merlin…. Harry fucking Potter…untie my fucking h-hands!"

Harry wore a soft grin of satisfaction while removing the binding charm. The instant they were gone, Draco practically launched himself at him. His legs encircled Harry's waist as he grappled to get his arms tight around his neck. The moan that erupted from that pale, little body was like that of an animal. He rolled his hips forward every time Harry attempted to buck him upwards. It was intimate, hot, sticky, passionate, and everything Harry had never before experienced. Even sex with Charlie hadn't been this wild. Underneath that gruff exterior, the elder Weasley was extremely vanilla.

But this….

A fire almost too hot to be bearable was starting to grow in Harry's belly, and the heady kiss Draco pulled him by his hair into only intensified it. His stamina not being what it may have once been, he erupted in a hard orgasm quickly. His vision blacked and it was all he could do to brace himself with his arms as he fell forward onto the bed with weak knees. He gave one more feeble thrust into Draco as the spurts of his seed dwindled. From that, he couldn't think anymore. The best he could do was hover there, trying not to squash the other as he breathed rapidly in complete amazement.

Somewhere in the back of his mind, Harry took note that his chest was heavy with Draco's cum. The fact that the other had finished around the same time said a lot to him. He smiled softly, resting his forehead on the soaked bed. "Shit…," he whispered. One word that carried a thousand unspoken feelings.

"I need a shower."

Harry, eyebrows knitted together, straightened up a bit and blinked down at Draco. The other man stared back, hard gaze unwavering. Any trace of the raptured lover he'd just had was all gone. He stood, gently sliding his limp cock out of its snug home. "The, uh…. The loo's the next door to the left."

"Thank you." Draco was all business – calm, cool, collected. He got to his feet and easily pulled on his abandoned clothing. And then he left the room. There was not a word, not an emotion, to show that anything intimate had been shared between them. The only sign Harry even glimpsed was the slight limp to his tight swagger, suggesting the pain in his backside.

Sighing deeply, Harry fell back on the mattress and curled up under the sheets for comfort. He couldn't help but to regret that he hadn't said more. Hadn't begged him to stay. Because…what if he didn't come back? Harry whimpered and hugged his pillow tighter at the thought. It terrified him. He'd put so much of himself into the relationship that turned out to be a dumb mix-up. And now he was just starting to realize that maybe it was a mistake from the beginning.

What seemed like hours, but probably more like ten minutes, went by. Harry's heart never stopped aching. Not until he heard the door creak back open. At that point, it started skipping around erratically.

"Your linens need to be torched."

Smile sliding back onto his face, Harry turned to Draco. "They don't meet your standards?" He chuckled giddily, watching the other man slide in next to him. The towel he wore around his waist fell to the floor, replaced by a kiss of sheets. He folded his arms behind his head, his long blonde locks splaying in wet waves across his pale and shimmering skin. Like this, he looked like a foreign god. A god of lust, temptation, and severe satisfaction.

Draco shrugged his shoulders in quiet response. His lids slowly closed over his silver eyes and his face stretched into a delicate yawn. "They're cheap. And that extends to these sheets, so you know…."

Another chuckle burbled past Harry's lips. He took another longing look at the other. Then his mind was made up. He was smitten, with Draco Malfoy of all people, and he couldn't let him go. Nor could he control himself. He shuffled closer, pulling Draco's warm body to his own, still covered in sweat and semen.

Immediately, Draco cringed back with a derogatory smirk. "If you wish me to stay for the rest of the night, you need to know a few things. One, I don't cuddle or snuggle or whisper sweet nothings in your ear. Two, I do not like dirty things, so I suggest that you clean up before touching me again. And, lastly, just because I allowed you to fuck me does _not_ mean that we are automatically in a relationship. I do _not_ know if it will ever happen again, so don't even try to smother me with your endless 'Chosen One' love. To me, you are still Potter and I do not foresee that changing anytime soon."

Harry was defeated as he lay back down on his side of the bed. Of course Malfoy would see it that way. He couldn't have changed _that_ much. Harry highly doubted that he ever became attached to anything. Or anyone. He himself on the dating website had said that he wasn't all that much into family values. "So…," he said quietly, staring up into the darkness at the ceiling, "you're wife doesn't know, does she?"

It almost sounded like Malfoy was on the brink of sleep when he yawned out his answer. "Astoria and I have an…an arrangement. I get to sleep with any man I wish to and she…. Well, she gets to have an affair with Zabini without my ratting her out."

For a moment, Harry paused to consider that. He was slightly in shock. This wasn't how he'd been imagining it in his mind. Honestly, he never even considered that Malfoy would allow his wife to be with another man, despite his sexual leanings. Maybe he had changed slightly.

"And you are divorced, I assume…."

"Yes," Harry said solemnly. It had been five years and he still felt strangely disheartened by it. "Ginny still lives in Godric's Hollow with Lily and James. I get to visit them every other weekend and on holidays"

"And you cheated on her." Harry cringed at the smirk in his matter-of-fact tone.

It was hard to keep the tears from his voice as he responded. "Yes, as a matter of fact…I did. With her eldest brother, actually. I upset the entire family. I'm sure some still haven't forgiven me…."

"Boo hoo. Go to sleep."

For some reason, Harry couldn't help but to smile. He'd been moping over this tragic divorce for so long that it felt refreshing for someone to blow it off. He bit his lip softly, dying to snuggle up closer to Malfoy. He curbed his longing by turning further away and holding tight to his pillow. "Night," he whispered softly, little butterflies tickling his stomach.


	4. Chapter 4

Harry's dreams that night were quite vivid. Usually, he tried to black out such things, but tonight he was too tired to care. Besides, they weren't all that horrible.

The first, and the longest, included a whole lifetime of new memories – His first time with Draco, which had just happened. Celebrating a month's anniversary with an expensive dinner and carnal, lusty sex that also felt deep down like love. This was followed by a proclamation of such love. Then Christmas, opening each heartfelt present with extreme cuddling and glee. Malfoy's first Christmas dinner with the Weasleys was next. What he loved about that bit was that everyone openly accepted their relationship. Maybe many months passed and he was receiving a brilliant ring and a proposal that could bring anyone to tears. A wedding with sweet Lily as their adorable, yet mature, flower girl. The night of their wedding doing things that made his unconscious self melt. After that, the images flew by like photographs. They were all happy with no qualms and no fights. At one point, he and the sultry blonde man of his dreams were even raising a small tow-headed child. And then, in the end, they died together after a full life of endless, unmatched love.

It was beautiful and everything he could honestly ever wish for.

But the next dream, after he rolled over and latched onto Malfoy's body, was much sexier. He got clear pictures of future sexual encounters. Not all of them were with his blonde beauty, however. He assumed that in this dream, he had his heart broken. The sex after he saw himself sobbing timelessly were skuzzy and desperate. He hated it.

It was waking up from that which solidified his chase after Draco Malfoy. He wanted the greeting card happiness of the first dream. He sat up sharply; looking down at the spot said man had been when he'd drifted off. Right now it was empty and Harry couldn't help but to nearly have a panic attack.

His breathing was harsh – he must have sounded mad – as he bolted from his bedroom with a sheet wrapped around him. He checked the restroom first, but it was dark and empty. Same for the sitting room. There would be no need to go into the guest room or Harry's office, so he didn't even bother looking. Instead, he went straight to the kitchen.

"Um, Dad? Pants?"

Harry pushed haphazard, dark hair from his eyes and scanned the small area. Sitting at the table was Albus, the source of reprimand. But what he hadn't expected to see was his ex-wife helping herself to a mug of tea. "Honestly, Harry, could you at least try to be decent around the house? What are you teaching our son?"

He couldn't help but to groan and hold his aching temple as Ginny chided him. "Ginny…. Why are you in my house, may I ask?"

She took her time sipping at the scalding liquid before answering. By the quirk at the cover of her mouth, it seemed to Harry that she enjoyed seeing him upset. "Well…," she started softly, setting her cup down on the counter. "Before school started, Dean bought Lily a puppy for her birthday. But, it seems he has an allergy to it. It's gotten to the point that we can no longer have it around. So, I've come to you. It would be helpful if you could keep the dog here. I know it would mean the world to your daughter if you would," she added at the end when it became apparent that Harry was going to refuse.

"A dog?" Harry looked away, shaking his head. "You know, I try very hard to keep this house clean. A puppy would _not_ help…."

"Padfoot is house trained. He's a very sweet, obedient, _loyal_ dog…."

The casual slip of the dog's name had the effect Ginny had been most likely trying for. Harry's head shot up and he looked at her with a mixed look of confusion, sadness, and intrigue. "P…. Padfoot?"

Smiling almost wickedly, she nodded and reached for her tea again. "Yes. Lily thought that it would mean a lot to you. Which is why it would be nice for you to take him in." She raised an eyebrow in challenge, daring Harry to decline now.

"Fine, I'll take the animal. But your boyfriend's paying for the food and shit and I'm not doing this for him, by the way. I'm doing it for my daughter." Harry rolled his eyes, cinching the sheet in tighter around his chest. There was a sharp, metallic taste in the back of his mouth that he got every time he spoke of Dean Thomas. It was much like the jealous stomachaches he had when he dated Ginny in sixth year. But it was different this time. Now it was a stranger feeling of hate, even though he'd brought this on. He was the one to ask for the divorce, so in a way it was his fault she and Dean were together again.

"Harry –"

"Hasn't he asked you to marry him yet? What's it been, like, three years?" Harry snided, crossing to the refrigerator and getting the pitcher of orange juice to get rid of the bad taste. He wouldn't look at Ginny as he poured a glass; her anger was prevalent enough by the sound of her harsh breathing.

"Three and a _half_ ," Ginny snapped. She dumped the rest of her tea down the sink. It seemed she was finally ready to leave. "Look, the dog's tied -"

A slam of the front door followed by, "Potter, your neighbors just complained to me about your yapping dog tied up out front," halted Ginny's words and actions. "Is that thing even yours? It's terribly annoying." Draco Malfoy walked into the kitchen, chest bare and slick with sweat. While blushing, Harry noted that he had borrowed a pair of his shorts and sneakers and that his cheeks were flushed gorgeously.

Ginny's jaw nearly dropped to the floor as she took all of these small details in. she then looked back at her nearly naked ex-husband and took on a sickly hue. "Weaslette," Malfoy merely said, only giving her a passing glance.

"Where _were_ you?" Harry whispered, looking like he may just flee.

"Out running. I go for a jog every morning," the blonde man answered as if it were just that simple. "By the way, I'm starving." Harry caught his teasing look as Draco leaned in and stole a kiss from his pursed lips. "Make me something?" It was clear he was enjoying Ginny's shocked expression.

Albus, from the corner of the table that he was sitting at, cleared his throat softly to try and break the tension. "I could…make some eggs…. Mum, would you like to stay for breakfast? I'm sure Dad would love to put on pants, if you say yes."

" _No_ ," Ginny snapped instantly. Her amber eyes were icy as she stalked straight past the elder men. "Just don't fucking kill that dog, Harry," was all she said before leaving as fast as she could. It both looked as if she was scared out of her wits and wanted to murder someone.

A sharp snort escaped Draco's nose. "Touchy." He snagged an apple from the counter and nonchalantly took a seat beside Albus at the table.

It felt like Harry's brain was swimming through all that had just happened, trying to recover. From somewhere far off, he vaguely recalled that he said was going to get dressed. And then he was in his closet, pulling on whatever was nearest and clean.

He had enjoyed his time with Draco thus far. But he wasn't quite sure that he was ready for other people to now this. And he was _positive_ Ginny was going to go tell Ron. This honestly frightened him a bit. His relationship with his best friend had been strained recently, ever since the divorce. But this may just completely shatter it.

Harry could feel he might burst into tears when he walked back into the kitchen. He leaned against the counter, sipping at his juice. The atmosphere in the room had gone back to being less volatile. Draco sat in the same place, still looking godlike in his shirtless state. Meanwhile, Al was busy scrambling eggs and frying bacon. It seemed that they had already taken care of the introductions and were keeping up a friendly chat about Draco's son. There was still curiosity in the air, however, visible in the way Albus' eyes lingering on the scars upon the man's chest every time he glanced over at him.

"Hey, Dad?" Harry looked lazily up at his son and gave a small noise to signify that he was listening. "Lily's dog is still out in the yard. Maybe you should bring him in?" He sighed and set down his empty glass.

The instant that he opened the front door, a small, all black Akita bounded up to the steps. It gave a sharp yip once it realized the chain it was tethered to gave only enough to allow him to put his paws on the bottom step.

"You're cute," Harry said simply, kneeling down to run his fingers through the small creature's abundance of fur. "But I doubt you'll ever live up to your name." He allowed a smile to tug at the corners of his lips. The puppy gave a small bark in response, wagging his tail. He seemed to just be happy for the small amount of attention. "Why don't I go get you food? I bet you're thirsty, too…." He stood, wiping the fur from his fingers on his ripped jeans.

Harry turned back to the wide open door, walking through but still not shutting it all the way. Still being able to see him seemed to calm Padfoot a bit. But, he didn't make it all the way to the kitchen. For some reason, he stopped around the corner and listened to the still easy conversation between his son and Draco. He didn't want to interrupt, for eavesdropping would most likely give him better results.

"- was stupid really. A friend introduced us awhile ago, but I'm sure he really wasn't much into it. Besides, he left after you and Dad got home. Made up some shit excuse, too…."

A small silence followed Albus' solemn explanation, which Harry assumed to be about his company the night before. "You're young," Draco said in a half-consoling tone. Then another pause while ceramic was moved around gently. "So…do your parents know?"

"What? That I'm gay?" Al laughed to himself, but the giddiness didn't quite follow. "Dad knows, of course. We get each other…tell each other practically everything. 's why I chose him after the divorce. But Mum…. Not yet. I'm holding off on telling the rest of the family I'm afraid they'll react the same way they did with Dad. I don't think I could handle that as well as he did…."

"You mean when they found out he had cheated?"

This time it was Albus' turn to be silent. Harry was willing to bet that he was calculating how much to divulge. He could sense it in the way his own face paled and heart pounded. "Um…yes," Al said softly. "I guess it was what prompted him to ask for a divorce. Everyone hates him for it. He's a bit of a joke in the family. It settled down somewhat when he actually started to date Uncle Charlie."

"And what happened there?" Harry was a bit surprised to hear the honest interest in Draco's voice.

"Well, for a year or so they just casually…hung out and stuff. Then they began dating things got pretty serious, too. Uncle Charlie lived with us for a little while. And then…it fell apart. Dad just got tired of him not being home. He's pretty much married to his work, Uncle Charlie. And in the end, Charlie broke it off and left Dad in pieces. Suppose that was about…two and a half years ago now. This is his first real attempt at dating since then. He's tried a few other things, but this Internet dating crap seems to be sticking."

"Your father and I are not dating," Draco said plainly. There was not an ounce of feeling behind it, just glaring reality.

"Ah…." Harry heard the sound of footsteps coming closer. "I'm going to tell him that food's ready." Quickly, he bounded to the door and closed it just loud enough for the other two to hear. A second later, Albus' head popped around the corner. "Hey. Breakfast." He smiled reassuringly but something behind it seemed empty.

Harry nodded, following his son back into the kitchen. He said, opening a cupboard and pulling down two bowls. "I'm going to get the dog some food and water." A sharp yelp sounded from outside the front door, eliciting a sigh. "Maybe I'll just bring it in."

Immediately, Al was on his feet. "I'll go get it!" He practically ran out of the room, not even bothering to try and hold back his grin. Only seconds passed before he was back, snuggling the ball of dark fur to his chest. Harry set the bowl of water on and ground and set about digging through the fridge. But it wasn't necessary as Albus was already setting about feeding him scrambled eggs from his fingers while holding him at the table.

With a snort, Harry shut the door to the refrigerator. "Did you know Lily got a dog?" he asked quietly and sat down between his son and his lover. Which seemed to be some sort of remedy to his worries as after he did so, he couldn't seem to take his eyes off of Draco's bare chest. It felt like all of the bad things in the world melted away and all that matter was this right here.

Albus shrugged, taking a bit of food for himself. "No…but it doesn't surprise me. Dean's always buying her things or doing nice crap for her. Don't know why…."

A small shiver ran up Harry's back and he tried to ignore it, but the sick feeling in his stomach had returned. "Suppose it's because she looks so much like your mother at her age…. She was about Lily's age the first time they dated." He cleared his throat awkwardly, showing a rather large bite into his mouth.

"That's _sick_."

Harry looked up at Draco, trying to hold back a grateful smile. He had been thinking much the same thing but was too decent to say it aloud. But Draco had no such tact. He could say things like that for some reason and get away with it. He admired that. It was sort of something he needed in his life. He needed the balance.

He needed _this_. Needed _Draco_ , a prospect he'd never even considered.

"He's just trying to be a good father figure to her," Al said softly and set the puppy down on the floor. Padfoot bounded happily over to the bowl of water and slurped at it like he was dying of thirst. The result was a multitude of splashes all over the clean linoleum.

Harry sighed deeply. He ate a few more bites before his stomach couldn't stand to accept the food anymore. "Suppose he's grown on you now, hasn't he?" He couldn't help but to feel a little disheartened by this. It wasn't like he was losing his most loyal child, but their dislike of Ginny's boyfriend was a bond that kept them strong. "Is he buying you shit, too?"

With a roll of his eyes, Al said, "He's not that bad, Dad. Besides, weren't you guys friends at school?" He raised a brow in challenge, his last words hitting heavy.

"I need a shower…." Ignoring the question, Harry stood and shuffled off to the bathroom. He couldn't answer his son because they in fact had. All those years ago, he and Dean Thomas had gotten on pretty well. But once he began dating Ginny again…something changed. Harry found that he couldn't overlook all of the small flaws the man had. How he wasn't worthy of his ex-wife. Really, he had no say in the matter, but that didn't stop him.

"You're jealous." As Harry pulled his shirt off, halfway down the hall, he felt a cold pair of hands place themselves on his hips. He relaxed at the touch, resting back against Draco's chest and halting his steps.

He whispered, unconvinced of his own words as he spoke them, "I am not. I just…don't like that he's trying to take my role as father to my children."

Draco's fingers dug harshly into his skin, nails snagging and nearly puncturing. "Don't act so pathetic. It's unattractive."

A wave of slight anger hit Harry hard and he whipped around. "What are you even still doing here?" he asked harshly, pulling his shirt back n to hide the inflamed wounds the other had left.

"I was eating breakfast. I was hungry," Draco said silkily and leaned against the wall. "But I will leave, if you prefer. I am sure that I have better things to do than play the part of Daddy's newest endeavor." His expression was calm but contained a hint of mocking hidden not so well behind his eyes.

"Fine, Malfoy. Go. I don't have the patience for your aristocratic games." Harry headed again for the restroom, suddenly feeling very exhausted. He wanted to feel Draco's hands on his shoulders, softly massaging away his tension. But when he turned back at the door to check on him, he was gone. The only hint lingering that he had even been there was the soft scent of his high-class musk.

Instantly, Harry's mood soured. He felt the chronic feeling of depression sliding back into his body. It was the most he could do just to drag himself into the shower. Even then, all he could do was stand in the warm spray until it turned numbingly cold. He didn't even bother washing up before shutting the water off and climbing out. He wasn't going to go anywhere, anyway. All he could force himself to do was crawl back under his sheets and try to fall asleep. He longed to have another happy dream about a promising future. But the scent in his room of Draco's and his mixed sexes distracted him. It had him achingly longing to take back what he'd said. To go back in time and beg the blonde sex god to stay forever.

 _Too bad it isn't that easy_ , he found himself thinking while his lids became heavy some time later.


End file.
